Busy Day…

I am thinking that it is really late to get an entry on here. However, I did have extenuating circumstances in this case. Last night I could not fall asleep because I am so stressed over my finances so I actually got some shut eye around 4:30AM. I woke up briefly and had a handful of pistachios around 9:30AM when the phone woke me from the sleep of the dead. I think the thing rang a hundred times before it woke me. I also believe the answering machine was malfunctioning. I went back to bed and did not rouse again until 1:00PM.


I had to take a shower, get dressed, pack a cooler since I go nowhere without soft drinks, grab my waiting room bag and get on the road so that I could stop for gas all before 1:50PM. I got the gas and barely made it to the office on time for my 3:00PM appointment with Brenda, my counselor. Today she ran late, so that my appointment started at 3:30PM, the client before me had an emergency. I was scheduled for a 3:45PM with Dr. Klopper, but I know that was unreasonable to even hope for, the man is always chronically late. I love him anyway, so I will wait, know that is the price I pay for a psychiatrist who understands me somewhat and I think in his way loves me too.


Brenda and I were in session a long time because she had lots to ask about what happened and why I am still manic. She even asked if I was using illegal substances. I would never do that, and know the blood and urine tests at the hospital had ruled it out, but since my episode was so out of character I guess she had to ask. We talked about how I am still in a hurry to talk without allowing myself sentence breaks. I rarely slow down for breath. I just want to convey everything at once. I set up another appointment for next Monday. We also discussed my finding a backup support alternative. This is to give another option for more frequent care. Everyone is concerned that even a week may be too long between sessions right now. I know I will be okay, but extra support is a safety net right now.


I waited until 5:45PM to see Dr. Klopper. He would not allow me to come off of any of the Depakote right now, but he lowered my Geodon back to my usual dose. Now I take 160mg Geodon and 1500mg Depakote at 8:00PM. The Depakote still seems awfully high to me, but my doctor says I might slip back into severe mania without the medicine right now. I will follow any orders he gives so long as I may stay out of the hospital. I do not wish to be inpatient again. I find it about untenable.


I did not get to leave the office until after 6:00PM because I had to schedule an appointment for Dr. Klopper on Monday of next week. The drive home was fine, I did really good driving today even though it had been almost two weeks since I had driven. I was a little nervous, but I always am when I am a little hyped up some way.


When I got home which was around 7:30PM I had to eat. I ate quite a lot before I stopped simply because I had not eaten much all day. I took my medicine and I had to make a phone call and take a phone call from Leigh who sometimes can talk me beyond the point I want to converse.


It has taken me a while to type this even though I wish I could type faster. I tend to believe typing will never become natural to me. I never have developed much aptitude for typing and do it poorly sometimes. When I am stressed it is very hard for me.



Jo Ann

  1. #1 by The Spacefart Astronaut on May 4, 2005 - 8:01 am

    Good morning Joann. Just wanted to stopped by, and say hi, and hope that you will have a beautiful day today. I will come back and visit your space once in a while. I need to go get some rest since I do not feel good right now. Just so that you know that you are in my prayers.Love,Sassene

  2. #2 by Sarah on May 4, 2005 - 9:10 am

    Best of luck to you.I don\’t know if this might be the right thing for you, but I have been manic at times, not for some time now and not severely, but it\’s still there waiting to get out.Anyway, I went to Emotions Anonymous which I found extremely helpful. It\’s 12 step, and helped me get control of my emotions once again.It\’s a shame some people don\’t understand there doesn\’t always have to be a reas.*hugs*.. nothing is ever worth really worrying about.

  3. #3 by Stephen on May 4, 2005 - 10:08 am

    Jo Ann -At 1,500mg your dose seems low – I\’m on 2,500 Depakote ER at bedtime. But I keep a theraputic level so it\’s okay.-Stephen

  4. #4 by barbara on May 4, 2005 - 10:17 am

    With all that you have been through I love that you always sign your entries "Smiles". Your lovely salmon color here on your Spaces is soothing to the eye but speaks of hope. Like a summer sunrise, yes? Smiles to you, Jo.

  5. #5 by Melissa on May 4, 2005 - 11:58 am

    Hi Jo! I just wanted to pop in to see how your doing. My thoughts and prayers are with you! Smiles to you and yours, Melissa

  6. #6 by SillyCrystalD on May 4, 2005 - 12:10 pm

    hey sweet jo, i just want you to know that you\’re in my thoughts and prayers. i think of you often and hope you\’re doing well, and if not that things will start going your way soon. – i\’ve had many family members who have gone through similar experiences…and i hope that you have people who can be there for you….like your son. have a great day….thank you for faithfully stopping by my site….you\’re a great blogging friend. talk to you soon!!BIG BIG SMILES!! – Crystal

  7. #7 by Kim on May 4, 2005 - 1:51 pm

    Hey Jo Ann! I did that the other night too. My mind was going in circles about what happened to my girl and I made it to bed when I woke my husband up at 6:15am. Thats not fun. Let God handle your money situation. You handle getting back to being your happy healthy self. {{ }}Sending extra angels your way.Kim

  8. #8 by PATRICIA on May 4, 2005 - 6:44 pm

    I really enjoyed getting to know you through blogging 101. I missed out on it , but I hear that there is going to be a blogging 201, perhaps I will be able to get that one in. Thanks for stoppin by and leaving me a congrats. We are all very happy to say the least.

  9. #9 by Virus on July 27, 2005 - 6:42 am


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