I have been out of the partial hospitalization program over a week now and I am doing well. I do miss going to the program, but it was getting less efficient for me as time wore on.
Alex goes back to school Monday, August 1… too early for a return to school in my opinion, but the powers that be have chosen. I believe that Georgia will soon go to year round organized daycare (school) because that seems to be what some people believe is best for youngsters. I disagree with the premise and am glad my one offspring will not be subject to such torment.
The start Alex’s senior year has me thinking how little time is left before he will be joining the Marines. I cannot seem to convince him that this is not a good time to consider military service and I am very afraid of what may happen when he joins up. I know this is still months away from that time, but I very much fear for the life of my only child.
I feel I am such a failure as a mother because I cannot financially provide opportunities for Alex so that the military does not seem the best option open to him. God knows I would give everything to keep him safe.
I read an excellent collection of novellas entitled Transgressions edited by Ed McBain. Ten outstanding writers contributed stories of crime, mystery, and suspense. I enjoyed reading this form from familiar names. Check it out if you have some time for a good read.
I applied for a part time cashier position at K-Mart and evidently will be starting work this week. I hope to find a better opportunity, but with my not working since 1993 I figure I have to start somewhere and I definitely need the money. My financial situation continues to deteriorate. I wish I had never made the decisions I did while I was so ill. I feel a total idiot for getting myself into such a mess.
Hopefully things will improve. I must believe so or be overwhelmed by sorrow. I choose not to be overcome and believe that somehow my problems can be turned to good.